Treehouse of Horror: Naruto style
by CandyGirl999
Summary: Naruto and the gang keep each other company in a tree house on Halloween night by telling ghost stories. Parody of the first Simpsons Treehouse of Horror.
1. Bad Dream House

**Treehouse of Horror: Naruto style**

**Author's Note: Since nobody has had the heart or the common courtesy to review my last Naruto fanfic despite it being my first songfic I thought I start with something new. I got the inspiration from several Naruto Halloween pictures form Deviantart and I watched my Simpsons session two box set with the first Treehouse of Horror in it and I got this idea so enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or the Simpsons Treehouse of Horror.

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**

Iruka: Um, hello. You know Halloween is a very strange time of year, personally I don't understand it at all. Kids worshiping ghosts, pretending to be devils, so many things unsuited for younger viewers and readers; things like the following three chapters. Nothing seems to bother my students, but tonight's fanfic, which I totally wash my hands over, is really scary! So if you are sensitive readers, maybe you should go to bed early tonight instead of writing CandyGirl999 angry reviews in the morning. Thanks for your attention.

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It was a dark and chilly Halloween night and the Rookie Nine and Guy's team decided to have a little get-together at the Ninja Academy. Kakashi, Asuma, Kurenai, and Guy decided to have their own little meeting inside while the kids entertained themselves in the tree house out back, but there was only one problem: Guy was no where to be found. 

Outside of the Ninja Academy a mysterious person dressed in a ghost costume came passing by, a hand reached up from underneath the costume to pull it off revealing a smiling Might Guy.

"I never get tired of this holiday and all its youthful delight! I love Halloween!" he exclaimed while reaching into his bag to pull out some candy only to catch a gleams of the tree house just above him.

"Hold on, lets see what the kids are up to." he said to himself, never passing up the opportunity to spy on someone.

* * *

Inside the tree house Hinata was trying to entertain her friends with a ghost story. 

"And the ANBU Black Ops on the other end of the phone said, 'We have traced the call, its coming from the floor below you! Get out of the house!' But it was too late. End of story."

Hinata looked at her friends to see if she scared anyone, unfortunately nobody was affected, it was deadly quite and all that could be heard was the sound of Choji munching on his chips.

"Yawn, I heard that when I was eight years old, it's not that scary." said Sasuke, making the Hyuga heiress lower her head in sadness. Kiba, Shino and Neji shot death glares at the insensitive Uchiha.

"Don't listen to Uchiha, Hinata. It's not you its just that it's such an old story that its lost it's touch." said Neji reassuringly to his younger cousin.

"Yeah don't listen to Sasuke-bastard Hinata, you tried your best, he just doesn't appreciate a good ghost story." said Naruto giving Hinata a foxy grin which caused her to blush.

"What would you know about a good ghost story dobe?" asked Sasuke.

"I know because I have a few good stories up my sleeve." replied Naruto proudly.

"Really, well then tell one." said Neji.

"Yeah tell us a ghost story Naruto." said Kiba.

"Yeah tell us." Came Sakura.

"Yes, please tell us a youthful ghost story!" exclaimed Lee.

"Tell us!" said Ino.

"Yeah Naruto!" muffled Choji with chips in his mouth.

"I could go for another story." came Tenten.

"What a drag." came Shikamaru's reply as he laid against the wall. "Why am I stuck here with you guys anyway?"

"Oh come on Shikamaru, don't you want to hear tales that will send chills down your spine and boil your blood?!" asked Ino excitedly.

"I'd rather look at a cloud." stated Shikamaru.

"You'd think you'd learn by know Ino." said Choji while finishing up his bag and reaching for a new one.

Shino was silent the whole time, but you didn't really need to hear his reply on account of the attentive look on his face.

"I-I would like to hear you tell us one Naruto." said Hinata with a blush on her face.

"Alright, flashlight please," said Naruto as Hinata handed him the flash light. Naruto places the flashlight under his chin so that the light was on his face.

"Hears a story that's really scarifying-"

"Oh brother." replied Sasuke.

"-I call it: **'BAD DREAM HOUSE' **MUAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!"

_(Story begins)_

Team Seven had been assigned a C ranked mission, watching over the Osaka house while the family was away on vacation. Although Naruto would normally be peeved about getting a low ranked mission he would never pass up the chance to show up Sasuke and impress Sakura.

The house was located near the village limits far away from any civilization. It was a pretty big house too, it was about three stories high and very gothic looking the kind of house that would send shivers down anybody's spine, and boy did it send shivers down Team Seven's spine.

While inside Kakashi was having a talk with the family about anything that they needed to know about the house, part of the mission dealt with them staying over night at the house for the week so the kids did a little exploring to get familiar with it. Naruto was looking trough the books, Sakura was admiring the floral print curtains and Sasuke was looking at a couple of ominous paintings in the hallway.

"Well that's everything you need to know, just make yourselves at home and we'll see you in a week." said Mr. Osaka as he and his wife and two children made there way to the car and drove off.

"All right guy's were going to be living here for a week so I want you to treat this house as if it were your own, which means no breaking anything, no clogging up the toilets and no graphite on the outside--Naruto." he directed this last part to him. Unfortunately said ninja wasn't listening, he was too preoccupied with the books.

_'Hmmmm, if could alphabetize these book I could earn praise from the family not to mention show up Sasuke-bastard.'_ Naruto thought with a grin as he began taking books off the shelf and separating them in piles. But what Naruto didn't know was that when ever he would place a book on a certain pile it would float in the air and land on another pile.

As a book levitated behind Naruto's back it went flying and nailed Sakura in the back of the neck, who was still admiring the curtains.

BONK!

"OWW!! Kakashi-sensei, Naruto threw a book at me!" she screamed while nursing her bruised neck.

"Did not!" shouted Naruto.

"Did too!" Sakura shouted back.

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

**"GET OUT." **came a loud voice breaking up the two Genin.

"What was that?" asked Sasuke as he made his way into the living room.

"Probably the wind." replied Kakashi.

"I'm going into the kitchen." said Sakura as she made her way to said destination but not before bonking Naruto on the head with the top of her fist.

BONK!

"OWW!! What did you do that for Sakura?!" scream Naruto while nursing his head, but Sakura just kept moving.

When she entered the kitchen she noticed what appeared to be read paint chipping off the walls, but what she didn't know was that it was actually blood dripping.

"This kitchen could certainly use a woman's touch," she said as she made her way to the cabinet to get some cleaning products, but some thing out of the corner of her eye caught her attention.

The pink haired kunoichi turned around to discover what appeared two be a hole in the wall, but not just any hole. It looked like there was a green cyclone inside it.

"Kakashi-sensei!" she cried as said man made his way into the kitchen.

"What's this thing in the corner?" he asked, pointing to the hole.

"It-it looks like a vortex, a gate way into another dimension." said Sakura staring intensively at it.

"A vortex huh?" asked Kakashi as he took an orange from the fruit basket and tossed it in, only for it to disappear. Two seconds later a crumbled piece of paper came flying out and hit Kakashi in the forehead. Sakura bend down to pick up the paper, unfold it and read it out loud.

"'Quit throwing your garbage into our dimention.'"

"KAKASHI-SENSEI, SAKURA HELP!" scream Naruto and Sasuke from the living room. The two ninjas rushed into the living room to discover an ominous sight.

Naruto and Sasuke were levitating, not only them but every object in the room. Naruto had a cord wrapped around his neck, chocking him and Sasuke was surrounded by a circle of kunai that looked ready to stab him in every angle.

**"GET OUT." **said the loud voice from earlier.

"WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?!" exclaimed Kakashi as he rushed over to untangle Naruto and free Sasuke from his kunai imprisonment, all the while Sakura had her arms wrapped around her shoulders as if she were cold.

"I can feel an evil presents in this house." she said fearfully.

"Evil?!" questioned Kakashi almost as fearful.

"Quite Sakura your scaring Kakashi." said Naruto.

"Kids get your coats, were living this house right now!" exclaimed Kakashi. Just as he said that, their coats came flying through the air and landed in there arms. They were about to go out the door by Naruto stopped them.

"Aw come on you guys, it's an old house of course there would be something wrong with it; we'll just get a bunch of priests in here and-"

"I'm not going to stay in a house of evil just to finish a low ranked mission Naruto." said Kakashi.

"Don't be so stubborn!" exclaimed Naruto while gripping his hair in frustration. "We're not talking about a low rank mission, we're talking about our steps to becoming full fledged ninjas, and my steps to becoming Hokage!" while Naruto was saying this he was being levitated and ended up sticking to the ceiling.

"AAHHH!" screamed Naruto but tried to hide it with a smile. "It's got great high ceilings!" Naruto began to fall.

"AAAHHHHHH!" screamed Naruto, Kakashi rushed forward and caught Naruto just before he hit the ground.

"Even on a low ranked mission you embarrass me dobe." said Sasuke in his usully rude manner.

"Shut your hole Sasuke!" exclaimed Naruto as he jumped out of his sensei's arms. "Look, let's just sleep on it alright."

"Alright, but if worse comes to worse..." began Kakashi.

"What could happen?" asked Naruto with a big grin.

* * *

(Time Jump: That night in Naruto's room) 

Naruto laid face up on his bed unable to fall asleep. Just as he was about to start counting sheep he heard the most ominous voice he had ever heard that rivaled the Nine-Tailed Fox's voice.

**"THEY ARE ALL AGAINST YOU NARUTO. YOU MUST KILL THEM ALL, THEY ALL MUST DIE."**

Naruto sat up.

"Are you my conscience?" he asked falling prey to the possession taking place.

**"I...YES, I AM..."**

Naruto could have sworn that the bedroom door was coming closer towards him.

(Sakura's room)

Sakura laid face up in her bed with eyes wide open.

**"SAKURA...SAKURA...THE BUTCHER KNIFE SAKURA..." **came the ominous voice.

Sakura slowly sat up in bed like a vampire would and went over to her dresser draw. She opened it and took out a large butcher knife, she ran her finger over the blade to check its sharpness; satisfied she smiled menacingly.

(Sasuke's room)

Sasuke sat up in his bed; his head began to turn all the way around his neck. He got up and pulled an axe from underneath the bed.

"They are all against me...they all must die." he said with a crazed smile.

(In the kitchen)

Kakashi looked over the knifes displayed on the rack and chose the biggest one of them and made his way to the center of the kitchen.

(In the living room)

Sasuke, axe at hand, began creeping up to the kitchen.

"Kakashi...oh Kakashi" he said in a menacing teasing way.

"I'm in the kitchen Sasuke." replied Kakashi in the same tone.

Just as Sasuke was about to make his way into the kitchen he saw Naruto walking into the living room carrying a butcher axe, followed by Sakura who was holding the large knife. Sasuke quickly abandoned his attempt to kill Kakashi and made his way towards his teammates.

**"DIE...DIE...EVERYBODY DIE!"**

The three teammate began circling each other while brandishing there weapons, laughing madly.

"HAHAHAHAHAHA!!"

"HAHAHAHAHAHAH!!"

"AHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!"

(In the kitchen)

Kakashi, while using the knife he picked out, began spreading mayonnaise on his sandwich. As he began to take his sandwich into the living room he was met with a horrible sight.

"What's going on here?!" he exclaimed at the sight of his students raising weapons at each other while dropping his sandwich.

"Naruto, Sasuke, Sakura stop it right now!" he screamed.

Each child turned their head towards their sensei as their names where called out. Falling from their trance they dropped their weapons and began apologizing to each other.

"That's it, we're leaving this house right now!" said Kakashi sternly.

"Aw come on sensei you said you'd sleep on it...!" whined Naruto.

"I don't care what I said, this team has had their differences before and their quarrels but we never had night fights before, and I blame this house!"

"Kakashi look!" exclaimed Sasuke while opening the basement door. The rest of the team went over to where he was and saw something very creepy.

"It's an ancient Indian burial ground!" exclaimed Sakura while taking notice of the tombstones and Indian feathers all around.

"Man this place has everything!" exclaimed Naruto in excitement.

"An ancient Indian what?!" exclaimed Kakashi. He marched over towards the phone and began dialing a number.

"Mr. Osaka, Kakashi Hatake here, when we talked about the house this morning you forgot to mention one little thing; you didn't tell me it was built ON AN INDIAN BARRIAL GROUND!!"

All was silent until Kakashi replied to the man on the other line.

"NO! YOU! DIDN'T!!"

More silence.

"Well that's not my recollection!"

More silence.

"Okay, goodbye." Kakashi hung up the phone and faced his students.

"He said he mentioned it five or six times. Well let's go, come on."

"Aw gee sensei..."

"Naruto!"

**"YOU WILL DIE...YOU WILL DIE SLOWLY. YOUR STOMACH WILL SWELL, YOUR INTESTANTS WILL WRITH AND BOIL, YOUR EYES WILL BURST AND SOME HORRABLE STUFF, POSSIBLE YOUR BRAINS WILL START COMING OUT OF YOUR NOSE..."**

Hearing that awful voice make those threats and seeing the way his students were being frightened Kakashi just snapped.

"SHUT UP!! QUIT TRYING TO PUSH US AROUND!! STOP SAYING THOSE HORRABLE THINGS AND SHOW SOME MANNERS!!!"

All was silent, Naruto Sasuke and Sakura, who had been afraid of the ominous voice, were now more afraid of their sensei. Kakashi at this point was shaking with anger and disbelief.

"Look at me...I've never been so angry, my hands are shaking..." he said while looking at his hands. Sasuke came up to him and began rubbing his back in comfort.

"Better than your eyes bursting." he said.

"Do it again!" said Naruto to the ominous voice

**"WHAT?"**

"Make the walls bleed!"

**"NO!"**

"Hey man we own you for a week, let's see some blood!"

**"I DON'T HAVE TO INTERTAIN YOU!"**

"Come on man do it! Do the blood thing! Come on do it! Do it, do it , do it, do it, do it!"

"Why are you trying to scare us?" asked Sakura. "Are trying to keep us from getting close to you? Maybe even loving you?" she said the last part with a smile.

**"LEAVE ME ALONE."**

"Don't talk to her like that." said Kakashi sternly.

**"HEY LISTEN MISTER-"**

"Oh don't call me 'mister'! My name is Kakashi Hatake, this is my squad and we're not going anywhere. We're all going to have to live together for a week so you better start getting use to it. Please."

All was silent for a moment.

**"HMMM...COULD I HAVE A MOMENT TO THINK ABOUT THIS?"**

"Sure." replied Kakashi as he and his squad stepped out of the house, waiting for the house's reply

**"HMMM... A WEEK WITH THAT ANNOYING LOUD MOUTH NARUTO, THAT STUCK UP BASTARD SASUKE, THAT ANNOYING WINING SAKURA, AND THAT PERVERTED KAKASHI. WHAT CHOICE DO I HAVE?"**

About ten feet away, Team Seven could see the house beginning to implode and disappear with a loud boom.

"Wow..." stated Sasuke.

"Awesome!" exclaimed Naruto at the sight before him.

"It chose to destroy itself rather then live with us for a week. You can't help but feel a little rejected." said Sakura as the team turned around a headed back to Konoha, with only one thought on their minds. How where they going to explain this to the Osakas?

_(Story ends)_


	2. Hungry Are the Damned

**Treehouse of Horror: Naruto style**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or the Simpsons Treehouse of Horror

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Outside the tree house, Guy had been listening to Naruto's story and couldn't help but feel a little scared; partly because of the scary voice Naruto was making for effect, but carried on listening.

_Inside the tree house_

"You idiot, that wasn't scary at all." said Sasuke.

"Oh yeah well how about THIS SEVERED FINGER?!" Naruto exclaimed while pulling out a box that had a severed finger in it, surrounded by blood.

"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!" scream everybody, including Guy who was still spying on them, fortunately everyone was screaming so loud that they didn't hear him.

The only people who weren't screaming were Sasuke and Kiba, instead Kiba started smirking.

"Severed eh?" he asked as he put Akamaru up to the finger. Said dog then began to lick up the blood on the finger.

"EWWW DOG SLOBBER!!" screamed Naruto as he retracted his hand and began wiping his thumb of dog slobber and blood, aka ketchup.

"Heh heh I knew it." said Kiba as he pet Akamaru's head.

"Naruto you jerk don't scare us like that!" exclaimed Sakura while smacking Naruto on the head.

"Yeah you made me spill my chips!" said Choji with tears in his eyes.

"All you ever do is eat chips, know wonder your a blimp and girls don't talk to you!" exclaimed Naruto.

"HEY!" screamed Choji in outrage and began to grab a near by pillow to hit Naruto with it, but was stopped by Shikamaru.

"Calm down Choji, it's troublesome to let Naruto get you mad."

"Yeah but what you can do is show him up with a better ghost story," said Ino. "After all you haven't told one yet."

"WOO HOO ANOTHER YOUTHFUL TALE OF TERROR!" exclaimed Lee, raising his fists in triumph.

"That is if he could tell a good one, after all the only thing Naruto can do right is tell a half decent story." commented Neji with a smirk.

_'I thought it was scary.'_ thought Hinata.

"I still whooped your butt in the Chunnin Exams, zombie eyes!" retorted Naruto in come back. Neji responded to this by throwing popcorn at the younger boy.

"Hey!"

"Quite, Choji's gonna start!" said Ino while handing said boy the flashlight. Choji took it and put it up to his face.

"Well let's just say that Naruto's story was just a warm up for this next tale that I like to call: '**Hungry Are The Damned!'**"

_(Story begins)_

It was a nice evening in Konoha and our very own Team Ten just got back from completing a B ranked mission and were celebrating a job well done at Asuma-sensei's house with a big barbeque cook out in the backyard.

"Are you done yet sensei? I'm starving." whined Choji while holding his plump stomach.

"Just hold on Choji I have to turn on the bug zapper, you don't want flies in your burger do you?" replied Asuma while turning on the bug zapper and walking towards the table to get the lighter fluid when he heard a loud zap.

KURRR ZAP!!

"Whoa that was a big mama!" exclaimed Asuma after hearing the sound of said bug get electrocuted.

(Back to reality)

While Choji was telling the story, Shino was sitting in the back of the tree house and made the sign of the cross in respect for the dead fictional bug.

(Back to the story)

Asuma began squirting lighter fluid inside the grill, unfortunately it was a little to much lighter fluid.

"There we go, man alive there's nothing better then a hamburger grilled to perfection." as soon as he said that he threw a match into the grill, only for the fire to shoot out straight into the air so high that the whole village could see.

"Cool!" exclaimed Ino at the sight before her.

"Could we please hurry up." Choji whined again. While two feet away, Shikamaru was lying on the grass looking up at the sun setting sky chewing on a weed. Just as he was about to relax something caught his eye, a large flying sauser.

Shikamaru shot up from his position and got into a fighters stance while Ino and Asuma ran towards him to the amazing by scary sight. Choji walked casually towards the group as well while biting into a hamburger.

"Your burgers are getting cold guys--" Choji was taken aback at the sight before him.

"Holy moly..." he stated, but that didn't stop him from taking another bite from his burger.

The flying saucer opened up a hole at the bottom, releasing a beam of light that shot towards Shikamaru and abducted him.

"WAAAHHHH!" he screamed.

The light then shot at Ino.

"AAAHHHHHH!" she screamed.

The light then shot towards Asuma.

"AAAAHHHHHH!" he screamed.

Last but not least the beam shot towards Choji, who didn't seem to be scared at what was happening but instead continued to eat his burger.

As the light began to beam up Choji it started to have a difficult time actually lifting him up, which was partially do to his size. Frustrated at the task the ship shot down another beam of light to help the other beam lift the chubby ninja onto the ship, once the task had been down the ship took off flying into space.

Inside the ship, Team Ten was huddled up together and shivered in fear as a strange figure came towards them. The figure was really scary looking, it was tall at least ten feet tall with green skin a large head, black oval shaped eye and four long fingers, it was also clad in black spandex with a silver belt.

"Greetings humans, I am Jorell," it said. "Do not be alarmed, we mean you no harm." it said while taking notice of there shivering.

"Y-you speak English." stated Asuma with a shiver while pulling out his trench knives from his pouch in case he needed them.

"Actually I am speaking Gorlockian, but by astonishing coincidence both of our languages are exactly the same." replied Jorell.

"W-what are you going to do to us?" asked Choji while taking cover behind Asuma.

"Cronus and I-" he said directing to the identical alien next to him. "are taking you to Charta Seven, a peaceful prosperous planet that challenges your inferior intellect.

"Look I know to you we ninjas are a lower order of life," stated Shikamaru startling everybody. "We face that prejudice every day of our lives, but we are happy on our little planet." By this time Shikamaru got down on his knees.

"We throw ourselves at your mercy, please return us to-" but before he could voice anymore of his protest an alien pushed a hovering table of dinner dishes with covering in front of them.

"Dinner time." said Jorell.

"Hey get a load of that spread!" exclaimed Choji with pure dilight.

"Here you go Earthlings take all you want, but eat all you take." said the third alien who brought them the table.

"Why thank you very much mister..." began Ino but was stopped by the third alien.

"To pronounce it correctly, I would have to pull out your tongue." he said.

"Eeeee..." exclaimed Ino.

The team sat down at the table as the covers from their lids were pulled of. Shikamaru's was pulled off first.

"Miso braised mackerel!"

Then Choji's and Asuma's where lifted up

"Korean barbeque!"

And finally Ino's

"Cherry tomatoes! They know all our favorite foods, they're a very advanced race...or their just stalkers." she said uncertainly.

"Come Earthlings eat, grow large with food." said Jorell, with that said Team Ten wasted no time in shoveling food into there mouths. Shikamaru stopped half way into his meal.

"There's something not quite right about this." he said, sounding a bit concerned.

"The boy's right lets get some sauce out here for these ribs!" demanded Asuma. Cronus went to the kitchen to get Asuma's order while the third alien began staring at Ino, Asuma took notice of this.

"What are you looking at?" he asked rather rudely.

"You're kunoichi is quite a dish." said the third alien. Asuma stared at Ino for a moment (who was currently shoveling cherry tomatoes in her mouth like an animal) and back at the alien.

"Um, thanks."

(Time jump: Twenty minutes later inside the aliens' entertainment room)

Shikamaru stared out the window of the space ship as they passed by different planets while in the background the aliens where showing the rest of the team around the room.

"It is our great pleasure to provide you with unlimited entertainment on your intergalactic journey," said Jorell as he turned on the TV.

"Here we get all of your human stations from every corner of the globe, all three thousand channels!"

"Do you get HBO?" asked Choji.

"No that would cost extra." replied Jorell plan and simple as they moved on to the next screen. The screen reviled a checkered pattern board and small circles all over it.

"Here we have an electronic version of what you call Shogi, here your primitive pieces have been replaced by-"

"Hey that's just computer checkers, get with the times!" Choji pointed out.

"I use to play that old game when I was attending the Ninja Academy." stated Asuma while Ino merly giggled at the aliens' silliness.

"Well we did build this spaceship," said Jorell, feeling a little insulted.

"Anyone whose from a species that has mastered intergalactic travel raise your hand." said Cronus as he and Jorell raised their hands. Being silly, Choji raised his hand as well only for Asuma to gently slap it away.

"Alright then," said Cronus smugly seeing that no one else has raised their hands.

"Sorry, your game is very nice." said Ino apologetically. Just then the third alien came into the room with another table of food.

"Dinner time." said Cronus.

"Hey, how come we never see you guys eat?" asked Shikamaru rather skeptically.

"Oh, well we wouldn't want to spoil our appetite for, the great feast when we land on Charta Seven." said Jorell.

"Oh boy, a feast!" exclaimed Choji getting excited about the idea.

"Will we be invited?" asked Asuma as the aliens pull the covering off their food.

"Oh you will be, I have a feeling you'll be the guests of honor." said Jorell while the team began to eat.

"Tell us more about this feast." said Ino getting more excited about the event.

"No no eat now," replied Jorell.

"When we arrive there will be plenty of time to, chew the fat." said the third alien as he and the other two started giggling.

Team Ten had begun to eat while all the while Shikamaru was having inner doubt.

_'There's something going on around here, and as troubling as it may be I'm gonna have to be the one to find out.'_

(The next day)

The aliens had called Team Ten out to weight them.

_'Weight us?! Why would they need to weight us?' _thought Shikamaru getting more suspicious. Asuma had just gotten off the scale; he was a good 140 pounds, all muscle.

Ino then stepped onto the scale. The arrow pointed to 120.

"Very good earth girl." said Jorell as Ino stepped off the scale.

_'Probable congratulating me on having such a great body!' _thought Ino while unconsciously flipping her hair.

Choji then stepped onto the scale. The arrow pointed to 150.

"Oooooh...!" exclaimed the aliens with great delight.

"Excellent Choji." said Jorell making Choji blush.

_'At least someone thinks I'm just big boned.'_

(Time jump: Dinner time)

Shikamaru had snuck away from dinner to do a little investigating. He made his way into the electronic hallway which leads to the kitchen. As the electronic door opened the third aliens back was shown to Shikamaru. The shadow boy immediately took cover behind a wall while eavesdropping on the alien.

"This will give the ninjas the perfect flavor," said the alien while flipping pages in a book and putting some kind of spice into the pot he was boiling. Picking up the pot he licked his lips and carried it over to the oven. As he left Shikamaru snuck in and grabbed the book the alien was previously reading, he only had to take on look at the book to figure it all out.

**How to Cook Ninjas**

Shikamaru ran through the corridor back to his team while clutching the book to his chest. When he reached the dinning room he noticed his team was enjoying a sushi dinner.

"STOP!" he shouted to his team, making them spit out their food and look at him.

"Don't you see what's going on?! Their fattening us up so they can eat us!"

"What?!" exclaimed Ino.

"No way!" shouted Choji.

"Oh, come on Shikamaru!" exclaimed Asuma.

"If you don't believe me then just look at this book that I found!" stated the shadow boy, showing the book to everybody, making them gasps. Jorell then came up from behind Shikamaru.

"Gaah! He's right!" shouted Choji.

"Humans, you have stopped eating." said Jorell.

"Listen you disgusting alien slime! Nobody, but nobody eats Team Ten!" shouted Asuma while he Ino and Choji pulled out their weapons preparing to attack.

"What are you talking about?!" asked Jorell in surprise.

"Don't play dumb with us we found you're book!" said Ino.

"What this?" asked Jorell while taking the book from Shikamaru. "It's just a harmless cook book, it's just a little dusty." with that said Jorell blew on the book and turned it around to show the humans the real title.

**How to Cook for Ninjas**

The team breath in a sight of relive and began to put there weapons away.

"Wait a minute," said Shikamaru while blowing on the book again to reveal more.

**How to Cook forty Ninjas**

"AHA!" he stated while pointing to the title.

The team gasped and pulled out there weapons again, this time read to attack.

"Wait, there's still more dust on here." said Jorell while blowing on the book one final time to reveal the book's one true title.

**How to Cook for fourty Ninjas**

"Let me get this straight, you thought-"

"They thought we were going to eat them!" exclaimed Cronus, making his way into the dinning room.

"Ah, good God is this some kind of joke?!" asked Jorell in shock.

"No, their serious!" exclaimed Cronus.

"Well why were you trying to make us eat all the time?" asked Shikamaru, who was beyond confused.

"Make you eat?!" shouted Cronus while pointing an accusing finger at the overly suspicious boy. "We merely provided an edible banquet, and frankly you people made pigs of yourselves! Especially that boy with the swirls on his cheeks!" he directed the last part to Choji, who put his head down in shame.

"I slaved in the kitchen for days for you people and..." the third alien began sobbing while Jorell put his arm around him.

"Well, if you wanted to make Tarff the preparer cry-mission accomplished!"

"Y-you aren't the only being with emotions you know." he said, making Team Ten feel guiltier then they had ever felt, especially Shikamaru.

Back on earth the space ship landed in Asuma's backyard, as the stairs descended the team began making their way down the steps and onto the ground. Before they left Jorell began to speak.

"We offered you paradise, you would have experienced emotions a thousand times greater then fun and a thousand times greater then what you call love, you would have been treated like gods and lived forever in beauty; but because of your distrustful nature that can never be."

"Hmmm for a superior race they really rub it." said Ino to Asuma.

As the space ship began to take flight and head for outer space the team stood and looked up into the sky.

"There were monsters on that ship, and truly we were them." said Shikamaru.

"Shikamaru, you see what we mean when we say your too smart for your own good?" asked Asuma.

"Way to go Shikamaru!" stated Ino angerly.

"Yeah thanks Shikamaru!" seconded Choji.

"Herrrmm..." groaned Asuma in annoyance.

_(Story ends)_


	3. The Raven

**Treehouse of Horror: Naruto style**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or the Simpsons Treehouse of Horror

* * *

**

It was already getting late and the kids had decided to tell one more story before turning in. The only problem was nobody knew who would do it.

Attempting to lighten the mood, Kiba decided to pull a Naruto and scare everybody. When everyone was talking to someone else and not looking, Kiba stepped out of the tree house (not even noticing Guy, who was still outside) laid down while trying not to wake up Akamaru who was currently sleeping in his jacket. Making sure his head was only sticking out, stuck out his hand and began to choke himself.

"GAGH! GAGH! GAGH!" he cried out while pretending to strangle himself, unfortunately no one was paying any attention to him.

"Hello, something scary happening." he said trying to get everybody's attention, but no one was looking. Instead, Lee was talking about the youthfulness of green spandex while Neji and Hinata pretended to listen, Naruto and Sasuke seemed to be in an argument about Naruto's ghost story, Sakura, Ino, and Tenten were deciding who should tell the next story, Choji was munching on another bag of chip, Shikamaru was taking a nap in the corner, and Shino was doing something Kiba had never seen him do before.

He was...in the center of the tree house, sitting on a soap box reading a book. Normally Shino would be sitting in a corner away from everybody, yet here he was right there where everybody could see him. What was he planning? Kiba decided to find out and began his choking fit again.

"GAGH! GAGH! GGGAAAGGGH!!!" by now Kiba was literally lying on the floor, but nobody seemed to be listening or they didn't care. Kiba then turned his attention to Shino.

"Hey poi Dexter it's Halloween, put the book away!" he called out directly to Shino; that got everybody's attention. Shino looked up at Kiba.

"For your information Kiba, I'm about to read you a classic tale of terror by Edger Allen Poe." everybody in the tree house just froze. Shino spoke for the first time the whole night, not only that but he was planning on telling the next story!

"WHOO HOO!! ANOTHER TALE OF TERROR TO CONCLUDE THIS YOUTHFUL HOLIDAY!!" exclaimed Lee while jumping up and down with a big smile on his face that would rival Naruto's.

"Sit down Lee!" exclaimed Tenten while pulling Lee down to the floor.

"Shino telling us a ghost story? This I got to hear." said Naruto while getting a seat right in front of Shino.

"Hmph, I guess it wouldn't hurt to listen." stated Sasuke.

"Knowing how creepy Shino is, it's bound to be scary." Ino whispered to Tenten and Sakura.

"I-I would like to hear your story Shino." said Hinata shyly.

"I bet it won't be as scary as my story was." said Choji while opening a new bag of chips.

"As long as it doesn't make me out to be the bad guy, fine." stated Shikamaru, waking up from his nap.

"Hopefully it wont suck as much as the other stories." said Neji.

"HEY!" screamed Naruto and Choji in union.

Kiba took a closer look at the book in Shino's hands.

"Wait a minute, that's a school book." Kiba pointed out. Shino only smirked.

"Don't worry Kiba you won't learn anything. It's called **'The Raven'**"

"Once upon a midnight dreary..."

_(Story begins)_

_...while I pondered weak and weary,_

_Over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore,_

It was a dark and cold night, and inside a mansion a grief stricken Naruto laid fast asleep in his armchair clad in night robes with a book in his hands. The cover said Forgotten Lore Vol. Two.

_While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping,_

**TAP TAP TAP**

Naruto woke with a start to the loud noise.

_As of some one gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door._

"Tis some visitor," _I muttered, _"tapping at my chamber door, only this, and nothing more."

**(Back to reality)**

"Are we scared yet?" asked Naruto, sarcasm in his voice.

"Naruto he's establishing mood." replied Neji before Shino could say anything; Shino was silently grateful someone was paying attention and continued with his poem.

**(Back to the story)**

Naruto laid back in his armchair and drifted off to sleep again, falling into an ominous dream of him, still sitting in his armchair, flying through a cemetery in the dead of night.

_Ah, distinctly I remember it was in the bleak December,_

_And each separate dying ember wrought its ghost upon the floor._

Naruto woke with a start again as he got up from his armchair and walked towards a picture that hung above the fireplace.

_Eagerly I wished the morrow;-vainly I had sought to borrow_

_From my books surcease of sorrow-sorrow for the lost Lenore-_

"Oh Lenore," Naruto said sadly while looking at a portrait of his deceased love. She was a very beautiful girl with lavender eyes and short blue hair, wearing a blue ballroom gown.

_For the rare and radiant maiden whom the angels named Lenore-_

_Nameless here for evermore._

Naruto jumped with surprise as he heard the sound of wind entering the once quite room. He jumped behind his chair and stared at the purple curtains sway in the night wind.

_And the silken sad uncertain rustling of each purple curtain_

_Thrilled me-filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before;_

_So that now, to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating_

"Tis some visitor entreating entrance at my chamber door- Some late visitor entreating entrance at my chamber door;- This it is, and nothing more,"

_Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer,_

Naruto stood up from his position from behind the armchair and began to walk cautiously towards the door.

"Sir," _said I, _"or Madam, truly your forgiveness I implore; but the fact is I was napping, and so gently you came rapping, and so faintly you came tapping, tapping at my chamber door, that I scarce was sure I heard you."

_here I opened wide the door;-_

**(Back to reality)**

"This better be good." stated Kiba with boredom in his voice.

**(Back to the story)**

_Darkness there, and nothing more._

**(Back to reality)**

Guy was currently listening to the poem from outside the tree house, like he did with the other stories.

"You know what would have been scarier than nothing?" asked Kiba.

"What?" asked Shino.

"Anything!" exclaimed the dog boy.

**(Back to the story)**

After looking around outside, Naruto stepped back inside and closed the door behind him.

_Back into the chamber turning, all my soul within me burning,_

_Soon again I heard a tapping somewhat louder than before._

**THUMP THUMP THUMP**

"Surely," _said I, _"Surely that is something at my window lattice; let my heart be still a moment and this mystery explore;"

_Open here I flung the shutter, when, with many a flirt and flutter,_

Naruto opened the window and let out a yelp when a small black figure came flying inside.

_In there stepped a stately raven of the saintly days of yore._

It was a small black raven with an odd hairstyle that looked like the back of a rooster's butt.

_Not the least obeisance made he; not a minute stopped or stayed he;_

_But, with mien of lord or lady, perched above my chamber door-_

The raven flew on top of a statue of Pallas and sat there.

_Perched upon a bust of Pallas just above my chamber door-_

_Perched, and sat, and nothing more._

Naruto just stared at the raven that sat on the bust of Pallas above his chamber door and just smirked.

"Heh, thought thy crest be shorn and shaven, thou," _I said, _"Art sure no craven. Ghastly grim and ancient raven wandering from the nightly shore-tell me what thy lordly name is on the Night's Plutonian shore!"

_Quoth the raven, _"You loser!"

**(Back to reality)**

"Sasuke stop that!" exclaimed Shino, obviously getting tired of everybody interrupting him. "The raven says 'nevermore' and that's all he'll ever say."

"Okay, okay." said Sasuke not really caring.

"Where is this story going anyway?" asked Ino

"Just pay attention." said Shino

**(Back to the story)**

Naruto stared at the bird with fear in his eyes that is until he smelled a pleasant smell.

_Then, methought, the air grew denser, perfumed from an unseen censer_

The censer sung down and hit Naruto on the head.

"Ouch! Stupid censer!" he looked up to see three angels flying above his head swinging the censer. One had short pink hair, one had blond hair tied in a bun and the other had brown hair tied into bun pigtails.

_Swung by Seraphim whose foot-falls tinkled on the tufted floor._

"Wretch," _I cried, _"Thy God hath lent thee-by these angels he has sent thee respite-respite and nepenthe from thy memories of Lenore!"

Naruto spun around to face the picture of his lost love.

"Quaff, oh quaff this kind nepenthe, and for get this lost Lenore!" he shouted while breaking into sobs.

_Quoth the raven, _"Nevermore."

"Damnit! Be that word our sign of parting, bird or fiend!" _I shrieked upstarting-_"Get thee back into the tempest and the Night's Plutonian shore! Leave no black plume as a token of that lie thy soul hath spoken! Leave my loneliness unbroken!-quit the bust above my door! Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door!"

_Quoth the raven_, "Nevermore."

By now Naruto looked like he was about to snap. "Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door..."

_Quoth the raven_, "Nevermore."

"YOUR GOING DOWN! BELIVE IT!" shouted Naruto, leaping at the raven.

"Oh man!" exclaimed the raven and began to take flight.

Naruto chased the little raven around the room in an attempt to catch the annoying bird.

"COME BACK HERE RAVEN-BASTARD!!" he screamed as it flew high above his head. Naruto made a jump for it but it flew out of the way, he then tried to throw a vase at the bird by it evaded just in time.

"Oh I missed!" cried Naruto as the vase landed on top of his head with a crash.

CRASH!

"OWW!!"

Naruto then jumped on the bookshelf and climbed up in order to catch the raven, but it only flew higher. Naruto tried to grab hold of a book that was sticking out of the shelf in order to give him leverage, but the instant he rested his hand on it he slipped and fell to the floor. The raven was trying to keep him from coming back up by dropping heavy books on him.

_And the raven, never flitting, still is sitting, still is sitting_

_On the pallid bust of Pallas just above my chamber door;_

_And his eyes have all the seeing of a demon's that is dreaming,_

_And the lamp-light o'er him streaming throws his shadow on the floor;_

_And my soul from out that shadow that lies floating on the floor_

_Shall be lifted-nevermore!_

Naruto looked up at the raven, who was still sitting on the bust of Pallas above his chamber door, from his spot on the floor with fear in his eyes as the raven began giggling menacingly.

"Heh heh heh heh..."

_(Story ends, back to reality)_

"Shino that wasn't scary, not even for a poem." said Kiba kind of disappointed.

"Yeah, I barely understood a word you said!" exclaimed Naruto.

"You barely understand anything people say dobe." said Sasuke.

"SHUT YOU'RE HOLE SASUKE!!" screamed Naruto with anger.

"I-I understood it pretty well Shino, but I'm s-sorry--I just couldn't get scared." said Hinata.

"Well it was written in 1845, maybe people were easy to scare back then." said Neji while taking the book from Shino to check its publishing date.

"Oh yeah, like when you look at Friday the 13th part one! It's pretty tamed by today's standards." implied Choji while crumbling up his last bag of chips.

"I disagree, I think Friday the 13th was scary." said Tenten.

"The only scary part about that movie is when that chick cut off the other chick's head." stated Ino a matter-of-factly.

_'Maybe next time I'll just bring the movie.' _thought Shino.

"Kids! It's time to go home!" shouted Kurenai from down below.

"Well my youthful friends, I can assure you I will have no problems going to sleep tonight!" exclaimed Lee as he and the others began to clime down the tree.

"Sakura, my cherry blossom! Allow me to walk you home!" asked Lee with hearts in his eyes.

"Uh--no thanks Lee..." replied Sakura walking ahead of everybody with quick pace.

"I can't wait to go to sleep." stated Shikamaru lazily.

As the children began to walk home the sound of someone shivering was heard, but it wasn't the wind. It was Might Guy, who had spent the whole night listening to the children tell ghost stories; and was scared out of his mind.

* * *

When the kids left home, the sensei's decided to stay and bunk in for the night. Kurenai and Asuma were sharing a room while Kakashi and Guy took the other room.

As the two men got into bed, Kakashi reached over to turn off the lamp.

"Ah no Kakashi! Come on my eternal rival please!" begged Guy. Kakashi looked at him with a board expression; he was too tired to put up with this.

"Guy I'm not sleeping with the light on. Their just children stories, they can't hurt you." with that Kakashi switched the light off, laid his head on his pillow and instantly feel asleep; all the while Guy was looking around the dark room with terrified eyes.

The frightened man looked out the window, and could have sworn he saw a little black raven perched on top of the tree by the window; laughing at him.

"Oh, oh I hate Halloween!" stated Guy as he threw the covers over his head and tried to go to sleep.

The End.


End file.
